Long long time ago, God was sitting in his garden of Apples, thinking what he wants to do with his new creation: The Earth. A heavy oval shaped boulder revolving meaninglessly around the hot burning Sun did not make any sense to him. So he went beyond his imagination and created trees and oceans and clouds and mountains and rains and snowfalls. From a distance, the earth looked like a paradise, but something told him that his paradise was not yet alive. So out came Adam and Eve in the garden of apples. God could not be happier at his best creation till date. And so began the introduction part, “Adam, this is Eve, your soul mate, a woman by gender” said God pointing at Adam who was busy scratching his butt and eating apple. Then he turned to Eve and said, “Eve, this is Adam, your other half, a man by nature”.

With in next 2 months, Adam and Eve fell deeply in love; Adam plucked fresh roses every morning for Eve while Eve prepared delicious food for Adam. The days were jovial and they made love every single night. Hanging from the tree branch they sang merry songs for each other and sat under the blue sky for hours watching sunset and adoring each other. Life could not have been more perfect for Adam and Eve. But nothing lasts for ever.

One night, Adam came home after a day’s hard work in the woods. He glanced at Eve who was busy trying to light a fire with lime stones. The most beautiful woman on the planet, and he loved her so deeply. After a romantic candle-lit dinner, Adam looked at Eve flirtatiously and said, “My Lady, Would you like to have a dance with me?” Eve blushed and slipped her hand in Adam’s hand. They danced to the soft whispers of ocean breeze and dancing tunes of sea water crashing against rocks. Eve rested her head on Adams chest thinking, this was all she wanted from life. She could not thank God enough. She looked into the deep eyes of Adam and said, “Honey, am I looking FAT???”

“HUH!!!! What?? You…Errrrr…I..dont…Errr…Honey you look amazing.” Adam stuttered.

“You are stuttering. I look fat, don’t I? Come on say it.”

“No no, not at all. I was just…” He had not even finished when Eve fired.

“I work all day preparing delicious food for you and you cant even say I look beautiful without stuttering.”

“But I….”

“Yeah go on. Tell me I am ugly and my food tastes like garbage. Go on.”

“No I just…”

“You man!!!! You are such a dog.”

“Dog? That’s not even a word. And don’t you dare yell at me for I work all day in the woods for you.”

“Yes you do, and you come home all sweaty and you would not even bother to take your bath once a week. You ugly lazy bastard.”

“Oh no no no woman. Watch your tongue or I will……………….”

And so began the longest battle in the history of mankind. As Adam and Eve ripped off leaves from each others body, God hid himself in his closet forever, away from the battle of MAN and WOMAN, and since has never been found.